What to bring and know before your mediation session
Child support mediation in Pasadena happens through the Pasadena Independent School District's mediation program or through a private mediator you hire together. You will meet with a neutral third party who helps you and the other parent reach an agreement on child support without going to court. Mediation is faster and cheaper than litigation, but it only works if both parents show up prepared.
Bring originals or certified copies of the last two years of tax returns, recent pay stubs (within the last 30 days), and a list of all income sources — including bonuses, commissions, self-employment income, and benefits. The mediator will use these to calculate what each parent owes under Texas child support guidelines. If you do not have recent pay stubs, bring a letter from your employer on company letterhead stating your current hourly rate or salary and how often you are paid.
Bring proof of any childcare costs, medical insurance premiums you pay for the child, and unreimbursed medical or dental expenses. These reduce the amount of child support owed. If you pay for the child's school tuition, extracurricular activities, or therapy, bring receipts or invoices showing the amounts and dates. The mediator needs to see what you actually spend, not what you estimate.
Key Takeaways
- Bring original or certified copies of tax returns from the last two years and pay stubs from the last 30 days; the mediator uses these to calculate support under Texas guidelines.
- Document all childcare, medical insurance, and unreimbursed medical expenses with receipts, because these reduce the amount owed.
- Know your monthly budget and what you spend on the child each month, because the mediator will ask and your numbers need to match your documents.
- Bring a list of the child's needs — school, activities, medical care — and be ready to discuss how costs will be split if you do not reach full agreement.
- Arrive 15 minutes early with all documents in a folder, because mediators schedule back-to-back sessions and will not delay for missing paperwork.
Organize your financial documents in one folder
Create a single folder with tabs or labels for each category: income, childcare, medical, and education. Put the most recent documents in front. If you are self-employed, bring profit-and-loss statements or business bank statements for the last two years, not just tax returns. The mediator needs to see whether your income is stable or fluctuating, because that affects how support is calculated.
If you receive child support from another child or pay child support for another child, bring the court order showing the amount. Texas law requires the mediator to account for this when calculating your support obligation. If you receive Social Security, disability, or veteran benefits, bring a benefits statement showing the monthly amount. If you have recently lost income or changed jobs, bring documentation of the change — a termination letter, a new job offer, or a letter from your employer explaining a reduction in hours.
Calculate what you actually spend on the child each month
Before mediation, write down every expense you pay for the child: rent or mortgage (your share of the home), utilities (your share), groceries, clothing, transportation, school supplies, activities, medical copays, and any other regular costs. Do not guess. Look at your bank and credit card statements for the last three months and average them. The mediator will ask you to justify the number you propose, and if it does not match your documents, you lose credibility.
Separate expenses you pay directly from expenses the other parent pays. If you pay the child's phone bill but the other parent pays for school lunch, list both. If you split an expense — for example, you each pay half of soccer camp — write down your half only. The mediator uses this information to understand what each parent contributes and to check whether the child support amount you agree to is reasonable.
Know the Texas child support guideline amounts
Texas uses a formula: child support is 20 percent of your net monthly income for one child, 25 percent for two children, 30 percent for three children, 35 percent for four children, 40 percent for five children, and not less than 40 percent for six or more children. Net income means gross income minus taxes, Social Security, Medicare, union dues, and health insurance premiums you pay for yourself — not the child. The cap is 30 percent of net income on the first $9,200 per month (this amount changes yearly; check the current year with your mediator).
If your income is above the cap, the mediator can recommend support above the guideline amount, but only if both parents agree or a judge orders it. Knowing the guideline number before you walk in means you will not be surprised by what the mediator suggests. Use an online Texas child support calculator to estimate your obligation, but tell the mediator your actual numbers come from your tax returns and pay stubs, not an online tool.
Decide in advance what you will and will not agree to
Before mediation, think about what matters most to you: the amount of support, who pays for medical insurance, who pays for extracurricular activities, or how often the amount will be reviewed. Write down your bottom line — the lowest amount you will accept if you are the paying parent, or the highest you will accept if you are receiving support. Write down what you want the other parent to pay for beyond the base support amount. Be realistic. If the guideline amount is $600 per month and you demand $1,200, mediation will fail and you will end up in court, which costs more and takes longer.
Decide whether you want the agreement to include a cost-of-living adjustment (COLA) clause, which raises support automatically each year. Decide whether you want the agreement to require the paying parent to maintain health insurance for the child and to pay a share of uncovered medical expenses. Write these decisions down and bring them to mediation. If you change your mind during the session, that is fine — but having a plan means you will not waste time figuring out what you want while the clock runs.
Understand what the mediator can and cannot do
The mediator is neutral and does not take sides. They will not tell you whether your proposed amount is "fair" or "reasonable" — that is for you and the other parent to decide. The mediator will tell you what the Texas guideline amount is and will point out if your agreement is far outside the guideline, but they cannot force you to accept it. If you and the other parent reach an agreement, the mediator will put it in writing. You will then take that agreement to a family law attorney or to the court to make it official.
The mediator cannot order the other parent to do anything. If the other parent refuses to share financial documents, refuses to discuss certain topics, or walks out, the mediation ends. You will then have to file for child support in court. If the other parent is abusive or you are afraid of them, tell the mediator before the session starts. Many mediators can conduct separate sessions (shuttle mediation) where you do not sit in the same room.
Prepare for the mediation session itself
Arrive 15 minutes early. Bring all your documents in a folder, organized by category. Bring a notebook and pen to take notes. Bring a calculator if you are comfortable using one; the mediator may ask you to work through numbers together. Wear clothes you would wear to work or to a professional appointment — not casual or athletic wear. The mediator will form an impression of you based on how you present yourself, and that affects how seriously they take your position.
Plan to spend two to four hours in mediation. If you have childcare, arrange it in advance. Do not bring the child to mediation. Do not bring a friend or family member unless the mediator has agreed in advance; most mediators require each parent to attend alone or with an attorney. If you have an attorney, they can attend, but mediation often works better without lawyers because it is less adversarial. If you do bring an attorney, tell the other parent in advance so they can decide whether to bring one too.
Frequently Asked Questions
What happens if the other parent does not show up to mediation?
If the other parent does not appear, the mediator will reschedule or end the session. You cannot reach an agreement with one person. You will then need to file for child support in Pasadena Justice Court or District Court. Bring your documentation with you to that hearing. The judge will set support based on the guideline formula and the evidence you present.
Can I change the agreement after mediation if I did not understand it?
Once you sign the mediation agreement, it is binding. Before you sign, read it carefully and ask the mediator to explain any part you do not understand. If you want an attorney to review it before you sign, ask the mediator for time to do that. Do not sign if you are unsure. After you sign and the court approves it, changing it requires showing a substantial change in circumstances — a job loss, a major illness, or a significant increase in income.
Do I need an attorney for child support mediation in Pasadena?
No, but having one can help. An attorney can review your documents before mediation, help you calculate your actual expenses, and review the final agreement before you sign. If you cannot afford an attorney, ask the mediator whether they can explain the process and the guideline formula. Many mediators are trained to help unrepresented parents understand the numbers.
What if I do not have all my documents ready?
Contact the mediator and ask to reschedule. Showing up without tax returns or pay stubs wastes everyone's time and makes you look unprepared. The mediator cannot calculate support without income documentation. If you genuinely cannot find a document, bring a letter from your employer or a bank statement that shows the same information, or ask the mediator what alternative proof they will accept.
Can the mediator help us agree on custody or visitation too?
Yes. Many mediators handle child support, custody, and visitation in the same session. Bring the same organized documents and be prepared to discuss the child's schedule, where they live most of the time, and how decisions about school and medical care will be made. If you want to mediate only child support and handle custody separately, tell the mediator at the start of the session.